Saturday, February 23, 2008

I Knew It...

This week has been so odd. It was fantastic to have Monday off. Wootness. And then we had Monday instruction on Tuesday. So Tuesday and Wednesday were like, the same thing. That was a little odd. And so then I kept thinking that the next day would be Friday, instead of Thursday. You'd think that it'd be the other way, since this school week was shorter... but I guess since... I don't really know. :P And now today has seemed like a long day. Going to class, breakfast, lunch... I have to remind myself that they were today.

And speaking of going to classes today... it was really good times. I had Music Civ at 8, and English at 9. The end. Yay. Music Civ was good times, because we just continued going over Romantic music. And that is some pretty great stuff. And in English we took a punctuation quiz, no biggie, and then a couple people read their opinion editorials (hooray that I wasn't one of them). And then we talked about commercials and the idea was to analyze them, but it ended being more along the lines of just talking about commercials we liked. And yet again, I was spared, and didn't have to share a commercial of my choosing. And then normally on Fridays I have a two hour gap, and then Psychology at noon. But I guess we're doing well enough with the schedule that we didn't have to meet today. Sweet. Two morning classes, and I'm finished for the day by 10. :)

So today I was just on my laptop, doing my thing, and I got an e-mail from the School of Music. With my results. Definitely unexpected... I thought I'd get a letter not an e-mail. It turns out that I was rejected... again. I had a sinking feeling that I would be, but I still hoped. My future is a complete blur at this point. I don't know if I plan to keep trying, or try something different... right now, I'm just not sure. I'll be alright, though. I'm just tired of trying, since every time I try I just fail. I'm shattered and heartbroken. But you know what? I'll be okay. This is just one of those moments where I can say, "Screw you, BYU. Screw you School of Music," and continue moving forward. I'll decide if I intend to audition for a third time later, but I don't feel like worrying about that now. Just one step at a time.

Thursday, February 14, 2008

Happy V-Day

Man, this week has seemed like a long one. Every day of the week, I kept thinking it was the next day. And now... tomorrow is finally Friday. Whoo! I only have Music Civ in the morning, and Psychology at noon. And that's it. Really good times.

The past couple of days have been strangely pleasant. Not necessarily really good, but definitely not bad. Content, I suppose. So yeah... good times. That, and I haven't had much homework the past few days either. And wow... suddenly I'm at a complete loss for what I was going to say. So...

Today, my brother got me a rose for Valentine's Day! It was so sweet... I love it. Jeffrey is just great. That pretty much made my day. Granted, the card he put with it was an index card folded in half, haha... but it was sweet. And I didn't have a vase or anything to put it in, so it's in a water bottle. Hehe. Plus, Sarah got some candy for me... which, by the way, was absolutely delicious. Too bad it's already gone... ;) That was really awesome as well. :)

Well, since I'm out of things... this wraps it up. I might even go to bed. Yep... or maybe read or something. Either way, I look forward to tomorrow, and maybe the rest of the week will finally catch up with me. Good night, and since I assume whoever reads this knows me, I love you all! Truly and sincerely. I hope everyone had a terribly fantastic Valentine's Day.

Tuesday, February 12, 2008

The Days Are Too Slow...

Well, school is just truckin' along... not quickly enough, sadly. I can't wait for the semester to be over. But, in the meantime, I just need to keep up with my classes. So, I ended up getting either a B+ or a B on my hip hop routine in jazz... not sure which, but it was somewhat disappointing nonetheless. It shouldn't be hard to get an A in a 0.5 credit class like this, it seems. But... we'll see. Hopefully I'll do better on the next ones.

I also got a 70 on my psychology exam... not very thrilled about that, either, but it turned out the class average was about a 71 or something, so he's going to curve it, or something... so, yeah. Good times. The bad thing is, I like going to that class, and I enjoy it, but I seem to have a hard time keeping up with the work. Maybe I'll start getting better about that. :P

But seriously, having to wait for so long to find out my results for my School of Music audition is killing me. I'm slowly dying inside. I just need to know. I'm going through another one of those phases where I feel completely lost about what exactly I want to do with my life. I thought I finally knew, but now I'm not sure. I keep doubting. I just don't know. And the more I think about it, the more confused I feel. It gets so overwhelming sometimes... like, I was talking on the phone with my mom this morning about it, and just started crying. I have all these different things that I'm good at, how am I suppose to choose just one? How do I know I'm making the right choice? I feel like no matter what I end up doing, I'll regret not doing something else. There just has to be something that's great for me... and talking to people about it doesn't help, either, unfortunately. I can get reassurance, but of course nobody can decide my future for me. My head is just swimming. I really need to find out about that audition, because hopefully it will help me. You would think, anyway.

What I've found I like to do the past few days is watch TV (though I didn't typically watch very much). All the fun shows, like Everybody Loves Raymond, According To Jim... good stuff. And one episode doesn't seem like it takes that much time, so I just watch one... and another... and couple more... :P One reason, because sometimes I get bored, and can't think of much else to do. Another, because I don't have to think about anything. I escape into my own world, and don't have to worry about the real one that I live in. The same thing with games... computer games and DS games. Definitely allow me to step into my own world. Yep... this is good times. What I should be a little more concerned about is doing a little more homework before the morning that it's due. :) Ah, well... whatever works, works. So, it's all good, I guess. :P

Oh, but the really good news is that a few days ago I got a Valentine's package from my mom. ^_^ It was so awesome... she bought another pair of the earrings I so unfortunately lost, I got a really cute (and super soft) stuffed puppy, a card from Chanelle, Goldfish, and some chocolate. Mmm... chocolate makes life good. Unfortunately, I'm pretty much out of that. Oh well. It was fantastic while it lasted. And the package completely made my day. :D

Tuesday, February 5, 2008

A Few Downers

Well, Thursday they had Hawaiian haystacks, as I would hope... but we got there at about 7:45, and it was all put away and being washed and everything! What the flipping heck? The darn place closes at 8! And I ended up leaving at 8, and everything else was still out, not even starting to be put away yet... seriously, what's their problem?? I was... angry. I'm planning to put a note of complaint in their suggestion box, but haven't gotten around to it yet.

Conveniently, my lesson on Saturday was canceled, due to President Hinckley's funeral service. Convenient, because I had only practiced... once. And that one day of practice turned out to be pointless anyway, because I tried to practice a piece by Strauss, which turns out to be a bit difficult to read in some parts, because it's like... a copy of the hand-written thing, I guess. So I'm done with that until my lesson, where I'll complain to my teacher and make her help me. :P

Sunday really wasn't a great day. That morning, Sarah and I slept in (to my surprise - I thought Sarah would set her alarm or something... but apparently she decided otherwise) past Stake Conference. Which was not a bad thing - in fact, I was quite pleased. I know, bad me. Whatev. I got up, while Sarah was still sleeping... and had a chat with Rachel that was just lovely. Sure... that works. Sarah ended up sleeping in until like... 1? Or so? I don't even remember. I was surprised, but apparently she stayed up until like, 3 or 4. I think it was 4. Crazy. The worst part of the day was when I was getting up and dressed for the day, and trying to put in earrings. I was standing in front of the mirror, 'cause that's what I do, which is at the sink... and I didn't get the earring in, and it fell into the sink, and slid right down the drain. Noo!! That pair of earrings is probably my favorite... or rather, was my favorite. At that point, I could barely take it. I just stood there over the sink, trying my hardest not to cry over it. To no avail. The tears fell, and went right down the drain with my poor earring. Not good times.

Monday didn't have a great start either. I was trying to print an assignment for my Family History/Genealogy class the night before, and it wouldn't print. The dumbest thing. It just wouldn't let me select a printer. So Monday morning, we wake up a few minutes early so that I can go to the open access computer lab in the Cannon Center and print it there. And I can't get it to print there either. What the freaking heck. (I discovered why by today, but that's a different story). So I'm going to have to ask my teacher if I can turn it in even later (it was already acceptably late, because I added the class late), which I assumed would be okay. And it was. But there was this thing in class that apparently is a rare opportunity, and we had to bring a pedigree chart if we wanted to participate in it. And it was extra credit. And I couldn't print the chart! So yeah, I was really upset about that. It turned out, the people who came to our class had forms for people who didn't bring their pedigree charts, so that we could still be a part of it. Good. Times. Made my day a whole lot better.

And today... well, I had a test in my jazz dance class over our hip-hop routine. And normally I can do well enough that I feel pretty good about it, while we're just going over it. But I don't think I did as well for the actual test. And there was one part where I kind of slipped because apparently I was shaking.

The good thing is, instead of band, I had another sectional. Which is good times, because I enjoy it more, and it's much shorter. Yay. I just hope the cafeteria has something yummy for dinner. They've been lacking for quite a few days now.